About to go to the meat processing plant (boy, that sounds very different from "frigorífico") for bovine blood. Biochemistry's practice today is going to be long (yeah, protein extraction from serum is you are wondering, it will be very tedious).

I would love to comment on a lot of things and respond to your comments, but right now I'm very stressed and very bitter.

I have also been pondering some things about fandom and me, and how, you should know, I complain a lot about anime fandom in general and (right now) Reborn's fandom in particular. I won't deny there is a lot of fail because there is, like in every fandom. Thing is I realized that a lot of things aren't exactly for me and that makes me even bitter. No, of course I haven't just realized certain fandoms aren't for me, but the negative effect they have may be kinda bigger than I thought. Leaving aside things I find objectionable (because that's fandom life), I don't find fanish joy in a lot of things those big anime fandoms find joy. It's saying something that Reborn's fandom (well, certain sections, I still can't get over Hibari's popularity and the moe/rape obsession) has treated me better than its canon.

The thing is, I have these unhealthy fandom relationships because I have grown up with shonen and anime and I just can't let it go. I would hate to do a dichotomy where there isn't one (tangentially, sadly manga/anime and the Hollywood are two of the biggest fiction markets and the ones I can access more easily), but Western fandoms of Western fiction sometimes excite me even less.

Anyway, going for the blood. *sighs*

Okay, since it's not on my journal I won't respond to this person, I really don't know how the OP feels about this, but seriously? Why don't you tell us more about your white European history and how fascinating you find the racism towards a Vietnamese descendant in her post?

If I didn't feel so uncomfortable about this, I would talk about white privilege, and First World privilege and how they interact in a global level. Because some things coming from both sides just make me so tired.

But white Europeans? Who colonized my country and the reason racism in incredible and tremendously prevalent here is definitely not USA (but I'm not saying their culture doesn't influence ours a lot, that's not what I'm saying).

ETA: I forgot to say it, but what really, really bothered was the dismissal of wistfuljane's experience. As if being German-American, Italian-American was the same as Vietnamese-American or Asian-American. Which clearly is not the case. (But the OP may not feel it that way, as a dismissal I mean, and I respect that.)

*blinks in front of monitor* *blinks more*

It's pretty unfortunate that my first post of the year (decade? there is a lot of debate about that) comes, and surprise! Yet again ranting against humanity.

But let me tell you something internets. Truly, you may not believe it, but there are more important matters than your enjoyment of slash fiction. You are not trivializing important issues because you are darker and edgier, you are doing it because you are young and very privileged and cannot grasp the severity of the matter in question.

No love, me.

But this need to be said.

ciderpress breaks in in the sockkpuppett' mess:

It is a mistake, a common one, to believe that the status quo, that ‘normal thinking’ is not a highly political ideology. It's a mistake to think that white-as-default views, male-as-default views, middle-class+ default views, economically privileged views, heteronormative views, able-bodied views, cisgendered views and opinions are pan-human views rather than a particular politicised ideology about society and the people in it.

Fandom is sometimes subversive, yes. Slash is subversive, yes. So is challenging default views and opposing discrimination of all kinds in all different places in society and fandom. These two actions are not in opposition nor in competition; they are generated by the same want and need that compels us to shake off what the mainstream tell us is "civilised" and "The Way of The World". They are both pleasurable and painful and cannot be separated from the squee that brought us here together. We are compelled to do both because we wish to be free to plainly enjoy and play with what we listen to, watch and read but it's hard because what troubles us in real life follows us here. Those –isms are not academic to me. I don't even know what critical analysis is and I don't know what social scientists do; I don't know the buzzwords. All I know is numbers, language and what I have seen of life.

Thank you, gorgeous. I don't know how we are still discussing this, but we are.

Do you know what I think? I think that LJ-based fandom is predominantly made of white, cis, able-bodied women. So talking about sexism towards white, cis, able-bodied women is something that is fun, intellectual, exercising. It will make you popular, and won't give you too much trouble inside fandom because you aren't speaking "against" the majority. But talking about race/cissexism/ableism inside fandom? Boy, that's mean. And not fun. And you are harshing the squee of white, cis, able-bodied women.

Yeha, this is me being cynical and judgmental. And tired.

Pausing study times because I cannot resist this. Just too damn... ugh.

Disclaimer: I'm not exactly the most versed person in USA's pop culture, so you have to forgive my ignorance.

I was having lunch while my little cousin was watching some MTV special called "Michael Jackson Greatest TV moments" or something. They were discussing some of the man's videos; this one, for a song I can't remember, was located in an Ancient Egyptian setting, Jackson was some kind of entertainer for Queen Nefertiti. (People here will probably know better about this video than me.) In this pop version of Nefertiti's time, she was played by supermodel Iman, the Pharaoh was played by Eddie Murphy, and everyone else in the set was black.

I was barely watching TV because my mind is full of three exams, but when I saw that video I remember thinking something like, "well, I think Jackson was trying to look for at least a minimal accuracy by no casting white people."

When the commentary about the video was finishing some white woman (I don't know who she was, I tell you I suck at this) was saying how, "also, the fact that Jackson casted African-Americans for this video was clearly a shown of black pride. He wanted to get close to his roots, his people."

I almost spit my food. Granted, I don't know why Jackson casted all black people. Maybe being a black man made him more aware of the white washing going on. But I will tell you something, that comment there? Just showed how ignorant and invested in white supremacy some white people are.

Egypt? Who did you expect him to cast? WHITE PEOPLE? Even if this was a pop music video, that statement was fucking ridiculous. Casting brown people to play the part of brown people is now "black pride".

Granted, there is a lot of debate about the "race" of ancient Egyptians. But dude. DUDE. Phenotypically, Iman is a lot more accurate Nefertiti than Liz Taylor is a Cleopatra. And having all black people is damn accurate for a music video.

What piss me off is that an all-white cast by a white person would obviously not represent "white pride" or something. Even if completely wrong.

ETA: What I meant to say is NOT that him doing it for being proud of his race was wrong or something. It's that when black people are cast to play Egyptians is a political statement, political correctness, etc., because what you would expect is white people playing Egyptians (emphasis, you know), no matter how wrong it is. And yeah, the latter is "white pride" and a political statement too, but for another post.

This brings me to the reconstructed face of the mummy attributed to Nefertiti. And how, googling for this, in some blog I saw people saying that "the [face] reconstruction was political correctness gone wrong. Nefertiti was white." (I know there is a bust of her with uber-light skin, I'm kinda sure the painting was a retouching.)

So, here you have a not so tangential rant: there is a reason I hate the term "political correctness".

"Political Correctness" = As icon says, meeting minimal standards of decent human.
And apparently, "Political Correctness" = Meeting minimal standards of historical accuracy.

I'm so tired of this shit, I'm so tired of hearing things like "political correctness," or "tokenism". And privileged idiots complaining that people are just SO sensitive for wanting to pretend that whites aren't the only people inhabitating this world. Or white people going about the "post-racialness" of the first world. *rolls eyes*

"Political correctness" means that the norm is white washing, oppression, objectification. Power differences that affect real people's lives and make things shittier for them? Don't exist because the privileged don't want to bother about them.

... Uhm, this was supposed to be shorter and sound angrier. It's been a while since someone screamed "reverse racism!" at my face.

Totally unrelated, damn hot fic that I have never read before (not work safe obviously). And I made myself proud knowing all that is worth out there for KuroFay. Damn.

I was making icons with the help of outou's great tutorial and these bases. Well, one icon! But I don't have much time.

Today is my last exam, and I can't sleep. Depression and family issues.

If you see me commenting on some place, but not connected to any IM (AIM or MSN) session it's because my Internet sucks and it's connecting and disconnecting every second. I'll be lucky if I can post this.

( Tsubasa's spoilers since Volume 2 until volume 18/19... 20? Don't read if you don't like bitching about Tsubasa's earlier chapters. Go on with precaution. You are warned. Dum dum. )

Enough with the bitching. You can see I'm not in my best mood right now. I don't have Internet.

Mari? Will you kill me if I say I want to apply for Kendappa at mukashi? ^^;;;;;;;; <.< >.> <3333333

PS: Tried a hundred of times to post this. Still not working. I'm not kidding, I started writing this about 05:00 am, now it's almost 08:00 am and... yeah. When I finally make it, I'm probably not going to have the possibility to edit it to add 'Yaaaay.' So:

ETA: Yaaaay. ...¬¬;

(supposed to be) ETAII: Please, be kind and tell me about my grammar's mistakes, I won't have the opportunity to even re-read this and I always miss something.

Aaaaand ETA III: (This time a real ETA) SPOILERS FOR TSUBASA'S LATEST CHAPTERS IN THE COMMENTS.

Estoy cansada del racismo. Harta. Podrida. No tengo palabras.

¿Si una minoría se queja de racismo y de no ser comprendidos por la gran mayoría blanca? Bueno, mejor empezar a pensar que esa minoría toda su vida sufrió desprecio, fue víctima de estereotipos, deshumanización, falta de empleo, reducción a ser la 'clase criminal/haragana/marginal' (que nunca pasa el grupo dominante, ¿si un blanco es criminal? ¡Son gente descarriada! Nada que ver con la etnia/raza) etc., etc., y tiene una muy buena razón para no adorar a la raza blanca dominante. Lo que la mayoría percibe como 'sentido común', 'normalidad', 'derechos', y 'adaptación social que debe seguir una minoría para ser modelo' no son más que privilegios que la mayoría está entrenada para no percibir. O mejor, percibir como algo natural. Ser mayoría dominante quiere decir que la mayor parte de la población comparte tu punto de vista o es de tu grupo. No escupirle en la cara a cada persona que ves de una minoría étnica o racial no quiere decir 'darle todos los privilegios del mundo! ¿Por qué se quejan esos haraganes criminales si yo con todo mi dinero, blancura, e Internet soy amable con ellos? ¡Son unos racistas!'.

No hay comentarios porque no tengo energía para lidiar con eso.

Tsubasa fandom? SHUT. THE FUCK. UP.

Just. One. Fucking. Week.

Oh the hypocrisy. "Ignore fandom." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You know, you would make all this so much easier to ignore for me if you just weren't SPAMMING EVERYTHING WITH WANK IN MY FACE EVERY FUCKING SECOND.

Dejando el bitcherío (tengo que tener un tag para este fandom, eh?), Dan, sé que tengo que aplicar a Kurogane, ¿pero me creerías que mi haraganería llega al punto de que no soy capaz de instalar el amsn de mierda, incluso cuando tengo el programa bajado y todo? (Esto especialmente también va para vos, Mako. Voy a escribir el post de la Interseccionalidad en español como te dije. Ya está. No hay otra. XD No sé nomás cuando.)

Che, por cierto, Danly, ¿te acordás que te debía un fic de Clover? aloneinkioto, ¿te acordás que te debía un fic de Death Note (Watari/L?)? Corazón de melón, ¿te acordás que te debía un fic de HoneySyn?

Bueno, hoy estaba pasándome algunos archivos y cosas de mi vieja y corroída laptop, y ¡encontré algunos de los fics que me había puesto a escribir! Ninguno supera las 300 palabras (no sé, ¿capaz que el de Clover?), y realmente no sé a dónde iba con ellos, pero es... entretenido leerlos. El de Death Note es, uh, especialmente entretenido.

( Clover fic. Sin título. Gingetsu/Ran supongo que era. )

Angst, por lo visto. Ni idea que es lo que pensaba hacer Kazuhiko. :S


( Death Note. ¿Watari/L?. Hmmm. )

..... ¿Quién es Jonson? ¿Quién es el asesor de Jonson? ¿Cómo es que avanzamos en el tiempo sin saber quienes eran Jonson y su asesor? ¿Qué es lo que yo trataba de hacer?

( Quién sabe si spoilers de Death Note. )

Y bueno, la gramática y todo lo demás era horrible porque eran... WIPs? La corregí algo para ponerlas acá. De verdad que me hace falta una beta.

¿Corazón de melón? Sé que comencé hace algún tiempo atrás a escribir el de HS. El asunto es que no pude encontrar el fic. No sé si lo habré borrado o... que, ¡pero recuerdo que lo escribí!

También encontré unos cuantos fics de KuroFay pero esos ya daban mucha vergüenza para mostrarlos. XDDD

Entretenida mi tarde. Tengo mi último examen el jueves, ¿alguien lo adivinaría?

ETA: SPOILERS DE UTENA EN LOS COMENTARIOS. FINAL. TODO.

I have to remember not to read a TRC's forum ever again. EVER.

People, sometimes? You just have to accept the gay. Sad, but true.

You know, Tsubasa's fandom always struck me as pretty intolerant towards Kurogane and Fay's het pairings. But now I see the fantards of forums in spanish going about 'how the gay will ruin their series', and 'HOW KuroganexTomoyo is SO canon'; and I just.... can't.

And I liked Kurogane and Tomoyo as a platonic pair. I truly did.

Estaba pensando que, mientras es cierto que todo el mundo tiene derecho a opinar, yo me ahorraría mucho dolor de cabeza si la gente que lo hiciera no fuera tremendamente estúpida.

Desde ayer que estoy deseando fervientemente que esta persona sea un troll. Primero creí que era alguien medio ignorante sobre el funcionamiento del mundo, así que pensé que no iba a perder nada repitiendo una vez más lo que la teoría feminista probablemente más ha repetido. Ahora sé que si esta persona no es un troll debe ser alguien cuyo cerebro está espectacularmente encogido por la misoginia.

Dejando a un lado las estupideces que dice y sus horrendas falacias en retórica, voy a hablar sobre lo que me dió un puntapié al estómago cuando lo leí.

Sos una mujer blanca, de clase media o alta que vive en un país de primer mundo. Bien por vos. Pero el mundo no se acaba en tu puta cultura. Esto quiere decir que una mujer no blanca que viva en tu país no vivirá tu misma experiencia. Una mujer blanca que vive en tu país y que no es de clase alta no tiene la misma experiencia. Que vos vivas en una burbuja no significa que el resto de las mujeres no pueden ser víctimas del sexismo. Sí. Hay mujeres muy privilegiadas que pueden darse el lujo de decir 'yo hago lo que quiero y nadie me juzga en mi cultura'. ESO NO SIGNIFICA QUE EL SEXISMO NO EXISTE.

Esto no es 'pobre de mí', ésta es la puta realidad.

Y sin embargo, la gente que tiene privilegios todavía puede ser victima de opresión, que tengas internet no te hace inmune al racismo o al sexismo. No porque una tiene computadora debe olvidarse del sexismo. O debe dejar de blogear sobre el privilegio masculino en un fandom predominantemente femenino.

No sé como mierda podés usar 'poor little me' como una forma de menospreciar las quejas de alguien sobre sexismo. Yo soy de un país de tercer mundo, tengo internet y soy de clase media (y muy, muy privilegiada en ese aspecto), y me enerva el sexismo en el fandom. Esto no significa que yo no sé que existe gente MUCHO más oprimida que yo en la vida real y tampoco hace que me preocupe menos por eso*. De hecho creo que hasta una discusión sobre sexismo/racismo en el area más trivial que se te pueda ocurrir puede aportar un granito de arena para la... concientización sobre estos temas en todos los niveles?

Como sea, POOR LITTLE ME.

Perdón, es que necesitaba sacármelo del pecho.

*Admito que debería haber más discusiones sobre estos temas, pero es algo completamente independiente al sexismo en el fandom: la discusión de éste no empeora la situación de las discusiones sobre, digamos, los indígenas en mi país. Con esa lógica voy a empezar a quejarme y pedir que cierren todo el resto de las discusiones. Caerán los foros de manga anime y de computadoras.

Estoy absolutamente muerta. No es porque soy melodramática ni nada, pero no sé como sobreviví a eso.

Como era un examen oral de bolilla (esos en que uno saca al azar los temas que va a exponer) tenía que estudiar la histología de todos los tejidos y sistemas del organismo espectacularmente aunque sólo hablaría de dos temas. Me fue muy bien, pero estoy tan muerta. No quiero volver a escuhar sobre un epitelio en mi vida.

Dejando a un lado las cosas que a nadie le interesan, POR QUÉ NADIE ME AVISA QUE SALIÓ HORITSUBA?

( Horitsuba <3 )

( Tsubasa 176 y un extraño e inexplicable rant al azar )

En fin, gente. Les debo algunos fics de navidad, denme algun tiempo, me recuperaré primero. No me culpen si me tardo!

...

Y pensaba que ya nos íbamos entendiendo. kuroxfai, tanto cuesta poner los spoilers bajo cut?

( Posibles spoilers de Tsubasa 167 )