Oh yeah, i totally agree with that, but if you are talking about the asshole part, yeah, I think what she means is that a lot of people like assholes, but they like cis, white men assholes. The point was that women (white cis women even) with the same traits would be undoubtedly hated.

And well, this is personal, but I also don't think our likes and dislikes or what we consider attractive (of this I'm sure) aren't that independent of society and culture or what we are taught to find attractive. But of course, that doesn't mean is wrong to like or dislike something, or that that would make it less valid.